On the 7th
of May, 2015, I went for a sperm analysis test. On the 9th of May,
2015, the results came in. I had a sperm count of 60,000M/L with a 0% motility,
the sperm count of a normal fertile male is about 20,000,000 M/L. in order
words, I had acute Oligospermia.
The
search for a child is not entirely new in my family. My step mum was married
for about 20years without a child. Her ex-husband passed away in 2007 and in
2013 she married my father. In the search for a child, they sought for medical
assistance.
Now a
couple of tests she underwent revealed that she had fibroid. Our family doctor,
who is the resident doctor at Ark Hospital, Ipaja, Lagos State, Dr Ajibaye,
recommended Prof for the fibroid operation. The surgery was successful and my
parents maintained the relationship with Prof. It just seemed like a No-Brainer
to contact Prof when I was faced with a damning test result.
The
report made me feel terrible. My ego took a major nose dive and I felt less of
a man. So all this while, I was living in a fool’s paradise, all this while, I
was firing blanks. But I had impregnated a lady before! I was a man! What kind
of idiot must have conducted the test? How dare they tell me that I was
incapable of making babies? Me?
Unfortunately,
the understanding of most men about fertility is warped. We equate fertility
with the ability to have an erection and ejaculate. When a man is able to do
this, he simply assumes that he is fertile. When he ejaculates and he can see
semen, then he believes this must definitely be choice seed. The problem must then
be the woman.
A woman
does not ejaculate. She does not gain an erection to show potency, neither does
she ejaculate to show that she can produce seed. And so more often than not,
she is the first suspect in infertility issues. Her anatomy is mainly internal
so we suspect that the cervix, or uterus or tubes or something else must have
issues. The day men realise that they can produce a bucket full of semen
without any living sperm in it, then the re-education can commence.
“Blaming others is an act of refusing to take
responsibility. When a person can’t accept the fact or the reality, they blamed
another person or the situation instead of taking accountability.” ― Dee Dee
Artner
My semen
looked thick enough, I produce it in appreciable quantity, I have impregnated
someone before…what went wrong? The result was there to speak for itself. This
man had a serious case of Oligospermia.
I wept
profusely even as Justina held me close. Why was this happening to me?
My father
called to tell us that the Prof would see us tomorrow after church service.
At night,
Justina and I decided to pray. Now we usually pray in church and every once in
a while, when we laid in bed before sleeping, we would say a short prayer. But
this night, we were faced with a grave problem. It wasn’t going to be the usual
prayer, we had become desperate. We needed a quick fix. God just had to hear
us!
Sometimes
when we go through challenges, we are not eager to understand why God allowed
us to pass through it or what lessons are there for us to learn. We just want a
quick fix and a testimony. We never want to patiently wait on God. No. it is
okay to begin to quote scriptures on healing and have children without even
having a full understanding of God and his ways. We want to see God but we
don’t want to develop a pure heart.
Reality
check…
Heaven’s
paramount interest is not bread for you or children to satisfy your cultural
values. Heaven is more interested in the salvation of your soul. Simply because
you ask doesn’t mean God is obliged to give you children. Are you saved first?
Have you
been purified? Is your body the temple of the Holy Spirit? Are you still
connected to the true vine? Are you still an eligible candidate for God’s
miracle? Are you in his presence where he wants you to be?
God is
not a doorman. He is not obliged to open when you knock.
God is a
proud landlord. And to see him, you must come bearing gifts.
The gift
of a broken and contrite heart, the gift of a pure heart and a willing vessel,
the gift of worship, the gift of praise. In all these gifts, he longs for the
ultimate gift, your soul.
Have you
given it to him? Are you worthy?
"The Lord is near to the broken-hearted and saves the crushed in spirit". Psalm 34:18
Prayer
that night was awkward at first. Since we got married, Justina had never seen
me engage in fervent prayer. I felt a little embarrassed at first; then my life
flashed before my eyes…I saw wher.e I had been and saw where I ended up…only God
could save me.
“My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word” Psalm 119:28
I burst into
tears and without a single care in the world, I worshipped.
“…Then men began to call on the name of the lord"
Genesis 4:26
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